The Purpose of My Shadow Self

I don't know if you are anything like me in this respect, but I can't seem to stop beating myself up. Guilt is my biggest self inflicted weapon; guilt that I am not a good daughter, sister, mother, partner, friend, neighbour etc, because of all the things I felt I should have said or done but didn't, or things I said or did, but shouldn't have, as well as things I haven't finished or have put off or never got round to starting, oh and all the things I forgot. Phew, what a number I do on myself!

Now, I do know about self worth. Despite the paragraph above, believe me, I have worked on myself and I am more confident, self loving and content than I have ever been.......but it is such an addictive pattern, I can still slip into that thought stream without realising for a while. So am I really an undeserving, unworthy failure? No! But I am a perfectionist, and that is the real root of this problem.

My perfectionism isn't competitive, at least not with other people, just myself, instead, like many people on a journey of self discovery and spirituality, I want to reveal the "real" me, to peel away the layers and become as close to that divine seed which is in all of us as I can. While that is a worthy aim, nobody's perfect, and trying to achieve that goal can have a negative impact too. There is nothing wrong with not being a perfect enlightened human being, because lets face it, who do you know that is?

The thing about trying to eradicate such tendencies is that we are then left incomplete and we deny ourselves self acceptance. We have a dark side. To try to rid ourselves of it is to deny its gifts and to avoid the lessons that that part of us has to teach. If we had no dark side how would we be able to empathise with the battles and struggles others face? Without the dark how would we recognise the light?

We live an existence of duality. We incarnate into a world of complementary but opposing opposites. We have the core of divinity within us, our guiding light, but we also have freewill, the freedom to make mistakes. Our world is one of night and day, hot and cold, good and bad, but lets not forget twilight, dusk, tepid and all the other shades of grey. It is because we have the ability to make mistakes that we have the ability to learn. Without these lessons, mistakes, our dark side, how could we ever seek to become "enlightened?

The problem with doubt, guilt or anger or other similar mindsets is that your feelings, thoughts, images and resulting actions, moment to moment are what shape your future. You always get more of what you focus on, starting now! For example the more I feel guilty about something, the more the Universe will throw up situations to allow me to feel bad about myself and so it goes on in an ever increasing circle.

The most important step is to recognise your train of thought and the feeling behind it. Then ask your self what is the gift this emotion offers me? If you feel guilty, are you being shown how you would prefer to be, how you would have wanted to do things differently? Did you not follow your intuition. Forgive your self and make amends if that is what is required. Run through your head, visualise how you would like things to have gone instead and resolve to do it differently next time. Then let it go! If you feel angry is it an ego thing, or is your anger justified? Did you express it in the wrong way or did you not express it at all? Are you now smouldering with resentment and confusion? Remember anger can be a hugely destructive force, but anger has its gift. Justified anger can be the impetus for change. Even peaceful protest such as that utilised by Martin Luther King and Gandhi were sparked by justified anger against oppression and exploitation that lead these great leaders to "fight" for change albeit with no violence.

Recognise your negative emotions, try to discern the gift, let it go, and then act upon your revelation. Recognise the darkness in others and try to maintain love and patience with them, for just like we all share the same light so too do we share the same darkness. Their journey is the same as your journey,its just that we are all at different points on the path. Use your darkness to let your light shine ever brighter. Embrace your dark side and love yourself, all of yourself.

Divine Inspiration

It's taken me a long time to write todays blog entry. I sat and pondered. While I did all the other things that make up the bulk of my day I considered what I might write. Usually an idea pops into my head spontaneously, and I think "eureka" that's what I'll write about today. But that didn't happen today. I waited, in the hope that something would happen, or an inspiration would present itself, or a chance conversation might provide that last little jigsaw piece that would put my day into context. When it didn't come I avoided it. Then I tried again. I thought it through and I considered possible topics I could write about, running through them in my head, but they just weren't right. I got in my own way.

So I decided to just sit in front of my keyboard and just write my truth, what that truth consists of, for me, here and now. That is what this is. I had tried so hard to "produce" an idea that I forgot that the words are simply an expression of an inspiration. That inspiration might come through me and take on the flavour of my personality, but I don't create the inspiration, It comes unbidden from a higher source, the Source!

Obviously there are many different opinions as to the source of inspiration, the Divine, the subconscious, the Higher Self, spirit guides and so on. I don't feel the need to pin it down and rationalise it. I just feel I need to appreciate two things.

That inspiration comes from a higher place

&

the importance of not getting in my own way.

How often have you tried so hard to make something work, to achieve an specified outcome, that you have made a complete mess of it? I know I have more times than I can count! The thing is that creating an outcome needs inspiration, positive focus, and action. Desperation will not help! Frustration and impatience only hold you back. When you try so hard to engineer things to follow a particular pattern you get in the way of the flow.

If you can, focus on your desired outcome, in a positive and relaxed way, and trust that it will manifest. Trust that the inspiration you need for any given task will come. Trust that events will conspire to help you, so long as you don't worry too much about "how". Thats the essence of the saying "let go and let God". Trust in your source, whatever that means to you personally, to guide you and it will happen, regardless of what "it" might be. Keep it simple, when the inspiration comes act on it. Oh and try not to over analyse it, looking for all the reasons why it won't work! Faith and inspiration go hand in hand.

Today, I had forgotten all of this. When I remembered, I sat here in front of my keyboard with no ideas but with faith and trust and my focus on a desired outcome without asking "how" and this blog entry is the result of my getting out of my own way.

Be Careful What You Wish For.......

I don't know how it is with you. But I have to guard my thoughts very carefully! I am a great believer in the concept of self creation, that we create our own reality, the events in our lives, by our actions, words, beliefs, thoughts, feelings and intentions and that these transmit a frequency that boomerangs back to us. As in "as we give, so shall we recieve!".

Take relationships. It is our core beliefs about the men or about women and our sense of self worth that attract to us an exact match for those beliefs. Anyway I'm getting a little off track. My demonstration of this principle this morning was on a much smaller scale but no less exact for that.

I was in that sleepy semi-conscious state in the early morning, probably about 5-ish having given little one a feed, and I was thinking about my daughter and taking her to the park later today. This stream of thought lead to a bit of regret and a little guilty feeling, that perhaps , in the setting up of this blog and the forum that I had neglected her a little and I needed to spend more time with her today. I thought maybe I should have a TV free/computer free day (obviously once I had done my blog entry, "The Daily Card" for the forum, replied to any comments, posts or emails etc). I resolved to definately take lil Jasmine to the playpark.

My partner, bless him gets up at 7.30am when I have given Jasmine some more milk and he looks after her till about 8.30 so that I can catch up on a little sleep, woke me up to tell me that most of the channels had been removed from our TV service. The broadband was gone too. I spent the next 30 - 45 minutes trying to sort out the mistake my cable company had made. Now, I got it resolved thankfully, or I wouldn't be able to post this blog entry, but what an example of the Law of Attraction in action!

So whatever you do, be careful what you wish for and what emotions you are giving out, because the Universe/Divine Creator/God/Goddess/Powers That Be/Fill in The Blank, does enjoy a little joke! I'm going to keep this entry short and sweet....We're off to the park!

Welcome To Starlight Intuitions!

Hello & Welcome to my new blog Starlight Intuitions, which will run in tandem with the Starlight Intuitions Forum. I created this blog & the forum because blogging provides a wonderful opportunity to express all the thoughts and ideas that I have, an opportunity that I personally need and treasure, but in isolation it is more of an intellectual one way street whereas a forum is a community, sharing ideas, opinions and friendship and sparking debate, which again I feel is incredibly important. I have decided to combine them in the hope that they might become greater than the sum of its parts and that it might become the focal point for an online community of spiritually minded people who wish to live in our world in a compassionate way that honours each of us individually and shares support, knowledge and experience collectively.

I am also looking forward to inviting forum contributors who are expert in their areas of specialisation to contribute to the blog occasionally in the future, thereby increasing the partnership between the blog and forum.

The Starlight Intuitions blog and the forum will cover topics as varied and wide ranging as holistic health and all that that subject encompasses; (e.g. exercise, nutrition, therepuetic techniques, energy work, visualisation and dreams, meditation and self improvement) All forms of Divination and Psychic Development (e.g. Tarot, Angel Cards, Astrology, Runes, Numerology, I Ching, Tasseomancy, Palmistry and more, as well as Mediumship, Spirit Guides, Angels, Signs and Synchronicity and paranormal phenomena. Starlight Intuitions will also cover philosophy and psychology, environmental issues, humanitarian issues and ethical consumerism. If your interest in these areas is related to animals or children we have forum topics on that too!

Other features on the forum that might be appealing include free reading offers, a healing request forum, a "promote my site" forum where you can tell us all about your website and what you do and post a link (in addition to entering your site on your profile so that at the bottom of your posts the "www" button can redirect people to your site!) and a Chatroom and our very own Guestmap .

I hope that some of what I have described be will be of interest to you and that you will consider becoming an integral part of the Starlight Intuitions community. It is my wish that these sites may grow and bring you the joy of meeting others who can recognise and appreciate the interconnectedness of the physical, emotional and spiritual experiences that unite us all on our journey. You're sure to recieve a warm welcome! I will try to keep the blog entries varied and updated on a consistent basis. I look forward to your comments.

love & light

Melanie xxx